In 2012 I read an amazing book by the famed author Dr. Brene Brown.  The book Daring Greatly dove deep into a quote by one of my favorite US Presidents, Theodore Roosevelt.  Dr. Brown’s book flipped a switch in me so big that I simply can not turn off the light in which it produced.   I have since recommended the book and her TED talk to everyone I know. So here is the quote by the man that helped shape the America we all love .  Please read it slow.  It is that good.

When we own our power ,we do not give others the “permission” to judge us unless they too have been in the same arena.    How many times do we allow others to judge us or shame us unwillingly?   Take back your power.  Even your mother and best friend has not walked in your shoes.  Maybe similar but never the same.  That is all on You  my friend.

Transitions occur naturally in life.  We all, if we are lucky grow old and life has its twists and turns.  Babies grow up and leave the nest.  Our bodies change, our interests change, all relationships grow and change.  It is  as natural as fall turning into winter. So why do we resist change  when at our core we know it is inevitable??   We are constantly transitioning  even at a molecular cell level.  How do we experience the courage to change  while daring greatly???

I shrink my world sometimes when big shifts/sh*t is happening.  I do not go dark, there is a difference. By design I intentionally stop engaging in so many activities. The extrovert becomes the introvert. I slow down  my daily routine and my communication to anyone who is not in my immediate wheelhouse.  I clear my schedule and I dive DEEP.  It is a noise factor.  I want less distraction so I can focus on a easier transition. It is the exact opposite of saying Yes to everything and everyone.  You energetically save the energy for yourself and those closest to you.  This is one of my most useful tools in “keeping it together”.  Minimizing the small talk and trivial interludes creates space in your world.  It brings clarity.   Instead of being depleted, “you” restore balance and extra energy starts to build. Transitions can be scary because you simply do not know how everything is going to work out.  New babies, new jobs,illness,  off to college, moving, big changes .. all of this can be a little frightening for everyone involved.  When we shrink our world we create space for the new to unfold beautifully, naturally .

When I was going through my divorce I shrank my world.  I dropped out of society and kept just a few girlfriends around.  Sure there were people that wanted to know what was going on and why.  There were the “reporters.”  I saw him here, I saw him there.”  “You poor thing how will you manage?”  There were those that were awkward. ” Congratulations.”   If no one has ever told you this, let me be the first.  NEVER I repeat never congratulate someone on getting divorced.  Miss Manners would not approve. PS They do not want to hear  you are better off either.   There are enough Monday morning quarterbacks  in the world!!!  No one wants to share shame with the world.  Bankruptcy, foreclosure, addictions, lost job whatever.  Other people love to blab your shame. Shrink your world, dive deep and turn it around.

Transitions to me are one door closing and another opening. Many times in life I have gone from shrinking my world to expanding it with the greatest enthusiasm.  Without changing it up, it is like reading the same chapter in the book over and over again. Who wants that??

Subtle changes can create such a wave that all you have to do is ride it.  New sport, new park,new book club, new blog, . New perspective.  Just something new .. I want new chapters in my book of life.   It is okay to be challenged… eternally bored and fatigued NO.

Transitions are a part of life when we go with the flow and resist Less ..it is easier.  By redirecting our energy to a new beginning after self reflection our world can  feel lighter.  Every day You have the opportunity to Give your Life meaning… instead of searching for Meaning of  life.   Shrink it, expand it and recreate it but do it DARING GREATLY.

To all of the graduates this season this blog is dedicated to you and  your family.  Remember transitions are meant to happen,  that is how we grow.

Who is better than you??? NOBODY